September 30, 2011

Being nice

I believe in nice people, sometimes. Other times, I don't know...

Being nice in daily occurrences can be so difficult. I think it's best to be spontaneously nice. If you are too nice to one person, you are a pushover. If you are too cold, you are a bitch. So, which is worse? It depends on the situation. I think when it comes to strangers, it is always best to be nice.

Today is one of those days where I felt like I was truly nice. Events unfold to create such a situation--it's not like I intentionally go around trying to do my 5 good deeds of the day (though, I should). Ahh, okay, I'm pretty nice most of the time--reluctantly helpful.

Walking downstairs from the parking structure, I saw this guy who looked like an Asian international student (just because he was wearing a cap) carrying a 32 bottles pack of water, a 24 pack of soda, a backpack, and a laptop bag. Worried, I sped down the stairs to ask him if he needed help. It's absurd, really, what I did, because usually I considered my actions before doing anything. Instead of caring about how others judged me, I let my actions take over.

Back to the story, I ran up to his right side and asked, "Do you need any help with that?" He answered (in a twang, like he's from the southern states, which is weird because he's Asian), "Ahhre you going the saahme way?" I answered, "Um, I don't know. Where building are you heading to?" He say (in that bizarre accent of his), "Mihaylo." I said, "Well, I'm not going that way, but I can definitely help you out. That looks really heavy." He hesitated a bit and eventually said, "Nahhh, I think I'm gooood." Instead of fighting to help him because he's a stranger I say, "Really? Are you sure?" He goes, "Yeahh. Thanks for offering, though."

Okay, I didn't get the chance to help him and should have fought to help him, so it doesn't make me a good person. Anyway, he is Filipino or something. And, he's not an international student. He's probably from the south. After this situation, I can't help but feel good about myself for attempting to do some good. It's weird. I mentioned the other day (not here) that there's no "true altruism" because we are always attempting to make either ourselves feel better or others. I guess there are moments when we truly want to help... but everything gets ruined once we tell others about it. Nonetheless, I really felt good about my action this morning.

Another "good" thing I did today was giving someone a free scantron. Well, it is not anything unusual because I typically give people scantrons whenever they forget to bring it during class. Even before Andrew gave me a stack of scantrons, I handed them out without asking for anything back.

I was posting flyers around the bulletin board around campus around 3pm when some guy asked me if any other places on campus sold scantrons because all the bookstores were closed around noon. (Now that I think about it, there are vending machines around campus that sold scantrons.) I asked, "Did you need a scantron for a class right now?" He says, "Yeah. I have a midterm today at 4pm." Feeling sorry for him, I said, "Well, I have scantrons. I can give you one, if you'd like." He says, "Really? Thank you." I said, "I work upstairs--follow me." It was an awkward walk up to workplace because we didn't talk. Also, my supervisor saw the whole thing--bringing a guy to work (she teased me about it with the other co-workers later). I gave him a scantron and he said, "I appreciate you giving me this." I said, "Yeah, no problem. Good luck on your exam." He says "Thanks", takes the scantron and leaves. Kind of a quick departure--probably because he thought men aren't allowed at a WoMen's Center or he's really a douche that used me for a scantron. Honestly, I don't really care about who he truly is, but being nice gives me this warm and fuzzy feeling. :)

Frankly, I did not need to list all these stories because I sound like I'm gloating. But, I really wanted to talk about something that happened today. I was pretty touched by what happened since I was pretty frustrated that no one offered to help. It makes me believe that people can truly be nice. Though, the whole thing may just be chivalry.

So, I have been posting flyers all around campus. The last place I went to was the library. The library has a pretty big bulletin board. The bottom half of the board was filled with flyers. I didn't want to disturb the order of flyers, so I attempted to staple flyers in the top half of the board. There was this bench right in front of the bulletin board. I climbed on top of the bench and almost lost my balance. I didn't know if it was better to ask the people working at the library (who were watching me) for help or jump up and down to attempt to staple them (which could take awhile) . I chose the latter because asking for help is a sign of weakness. Side note: I accept help when it's offered, but I have too much pride to ask for help. Well, not as much pride as males, since they won't even ask for directions!

Basically, I looked so stupid in front of the bulletin board, jumping up and down, trying to stick the stupid flyers up. I concentrated so much on jumping up and down that I was surprised to hear a super tall guy ask, "Do you need help?" Defeated, I said, "Yes. Can you help me staple these last two flyers?" He put his books down in the bench and helped me staple the flyers. How nice, right? I thanked him and left him in front of the bulletin board after he was done since it looked like he was interested in reading the flyers. The end.

So, I just want to say, being nice does have its perks. It can truly make someone appreciate them. And, it was a nice day.

Photo source: here


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